Why do people ‘ghost’ in relationships?

Why do people 'ghost' in relationships.
in all three cases ghosting is usually done because they don't or want to tell you the underlying reason for them stopping conversation

There are three common reasons for ghosting (I’m sure there are others) I’ve experienced what I believe to be all three.
1. The first but least common (IMO) is the person found someone else they prefer. One way to tell is does the person remain online or do they hide/remove their profile. Most of the time they remain active on the site, which to me indicates that this has not occurred.

  1. The second and more common reason is they don’t think you match up or that they can do better as dating sites give the feeling that a bigger better deal is just one click away. As to the first part of matching your views don’t sync up.

Most often it isn’t just one specific thing that could have been misinterpreted but rather multiple issues where they feel you aren’t like-minded enough. This includes but is not limited to those that they might only want one night stands and they find out you are sticking to your guns about a relationship.

  1. The third, and in my experience the most common reason is that the person never was really seeking a relationship in the first place, rather they just wanted interaction (pen pals if you will). The best way to minimize this scenario is after a dialogue has been established and you feel comfortable enough with the person you want to meet, you should do so. Also, people become bored and lose interest if you wait too long.

Meeting avoids wasting of time with the plethora of people who aren’t serious. Someone who isn’t serious and just wants to chat will delay repetitively but after a couple of attempts you can move on quickly. You can even see clues in their pictures and profiles that a person might be this way. An undeveloped profile after being on the site for extended periods of time. Only a single picture (no excuse this day in age, even selfies will suffice) or picture of nothing but quotes and vacation destinations/scenery without them even being in the picture are all signs the person may not be serious about seeking a partner.

Regardless, in all three cases ghosting is usually done because they don’t or want to tell you the underlying reason for them stopping conversation, as this often turns into a debate. I’ve found debating a point about how the other person feels (fairly or unfairly) to be generally unproductive and fruitless, unless it is a misunderstanding on a single issue but rarely is that the case. It is just better to move on.

Answer by Bill Smith, on Quora

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